My therapist lost both of his parents in the course of one year. It was extremely hard on him, he lost weight, he's always impeccably dressed, but something just seemed a little off.

I told him that he needed to eat a sandwich or two, drink some ensure or something and simply asked if he had someone to talk about it with. Without a doubt I grieved for him, but it did not take over my therapy.

He genuinely thanked me. Then we carried on. I did give him some time, and shared some of my thoughts on death. Not in a way like "this is what your parents' death should make you feel", but several sessions later, in response to something else. We exchanged ideas. It was nice.

Fortunately, I'm not worried about my therapist retiring, he's already told me he's going to work until he dies. He loves it and has no desire to stop.

When my therapist is direct with me, I definitely take it on the chin at first. However, there usually is some truth to what he is asking me to do. He's noticed something that I have not. Do you think there is any truth to the comment about DBT? If so, maybe you could do more.

Also, maybe you could talk to your therapist about which skills she thinks that you need to be applying - the ones that would help you most. It's a pretty big workbook, that DBT stuff!