I know this might not be a feasible solution to your problem, but you say that you want your house up to standards that you cannot do yourself and that your husband cannot see/understand. (I really appreciated you replying and mentioning that your husband sees things as fine already so he probably CAN'T see what else you want done; I think that is very insightful, and probably very true for a lot of things in our everyday lives). Perhaps the two of you could hire someone to help clean your house so that you do not have to push to your limits to get what you want. I realize this might not be doable, but I wonder if it would help ease a lot of stress in your household. Only having someone come in once a week or even every other week could make a huge difference both in your home and on your mind so you don't feel overwhelmed.

I'm sorry that your husband has a way of invalidating your feelings because he sees it as a symptom of your mental illness -- my parents used to do that to me when I was in high school (right after I was diagnosed with depression and GAD). It's infuriating, to say the very least. I'm also glad that you have a therapist standing in your corner helping you out.