Dottie, I'm sorry for your pain. I was talking in general terms. Your situation sounds very unique. You sound pretty sure that it's because of your mental illness, but have you talked to your T about whether you have behaved in a hurtful way toward them BECAUSE of your mental illness? I know from my own experience of being on the receiving end of someone with a M.I. that it's pretty hard to separate the behavior of the person's personality versus the illness. I belong to another support group for spouses/SO's of people with depression and bipolar, and anger, hostility, even violence is pretty common. Maybe there is a component of that in your 2 children's avoidance... not the illness itself, but the behavior that came out of having one? You don't have to answer -- it's just food for thought. This thread is about the holidays at SeptemberMorn's house, anyway.

OKNUTS - thank you very much for that perspective. I don't know if it helps the older people here to see a reminder that perhaps the "pulling away" is a common trend as younger people try to start their own traditions with their new families. Hopefully this data helps people feel less personally rejected, knowing that it's a natural phase that people go through.