I think the feeling is common for those of us who experience depression... for some people the public releases lessen if they allow themselves to cry in private, or at least at home, etc... If you continue to just hold back all the time, there's a good likelihood imo that you won't be able to control it in public.

There isn't a T session that goes by that at least a few tears don't run down my face... even though I'm not actively "crying." I'm not one to sob uncontrollably to begin with though... maybe if I did or could, I'd feel different?