I am so sorry you are feeling this way Phoenix! I wish I had some advice to give you, how to stop the dreams and how to handle the things that are weighing you down so drastically. You are a very strong woman for enduring so much pain to keep your daughter healthy and safe. It's a hard thing to do and takes a very strong person to endure all of this without any meds. You are one of a kind and you will crawl out of this a little beaten and battered but in the end a much stronger and much more powerful woman and mother than you ever could have imagined. I applaud your courage and your love for your daughter and only wish others would love their children as much as it appears you love yours.

Again I wish I had many kind words and deep life changing advice. I guess if I had those I wouldn't be here. I am so sorry you are in pain and I will keep you in my thoughts.

Gentle hugs if ok!