I am 17. I apologize for not answering this question earlier. My parents plan to be in charge of my life for as long as possible, making the fact that I am planning to leave for college next year another point of contention between us.

Religion is such a tricky thing. It seems to either make or break people and while it made me for a long time, it eventually crashed down with me underneath it, resulting in broken hope, faith and a soul in comatose. Wheter that is my fault or Catholosisms, I do not presume to know. I have come to see faith as just another way to cope. It helps many people and I am glad of that. We all need all the help we can get down here.

I hesistate to bring this up, because it just adds to the fun and makes me life seem like a never ending tale of misery (which in all honesty, it is not. Unpleasant, yes. Miserable, no.) but I am homeschooled. LOL The "school counselor" option, which has been suggested to me so many times by well meaning individuals, is impossible.

I do not blame them. I just wish things could be different. I go to considerable lengths to hide my secrets from them because their reaction to them would push me over the edge. They look for problems in all the wrong places. I do not think they "believe in" depression and the like and the possibility of me cutting has probably never even crossed their minds. That's just not something kids who have been brought up like me DO.

They think it's my friend's fault that I "suddenly" don't want to live like they do. In a way I wish I could find the words to explain to them that rather than being the problem, he kept me alive for a while. But that would only make things worse. Oh God, if they knew about the cutting... it would kill them (after they had buried me alive and danced on my grave, of course.) lol

Basically, I am doing as you suggested, Leed and just trying not to butt heads when at all possible. I come to church without complaint. I sing at the flippen church! I have made their lives far more difficult, that is for sure. I have often wished that I had just hung on until college to "rebell".