You have A LOT on your plate right now. It's only fair that you need time out to recharge your batteries.
Please try and open up to your T as much as possible. She can help you carry the load and teach you coping skills - but she has to know what's going on first. If you are going to span, rather let it happen in the caring environment of T. She'll look after you and get you back on your feet.

Regarding your job - try look at it as a priviledge - you are able to be productive and give something back to your family, you are an integral part of your community - your family.
You really do care for each and every member of your family, and are doing your best to keep it all together.
Are you on the best possible meds for yourself?
I really hope things work out soon for you. Thanks for sharing your story with us. We'll give you as much support as we can