i'm all for giving second chances, i've definitely needed them when i've made mistakes and i've given people second chances who've hurt me. I have issues with giving 4th 5th 10th chances though. It's not right, and I would go so far as to say its manipulation, to always use mental illness as an excuse for repeated awful behavior.

I'm bipolar and I've been in treatment for a while now (about 5 years, intensively). I have a great deal of self awareness about what's wrong with me, and how my cycles impact my life. I was already well established in treatment when I married my husband, so my experience is slightly different.

I am fortuante my husband takes my crying and irritability with a grain of salt. I am fortunate he can live with me when I have problems with paranoia and deep depression and he's coming to terms with the way mania presents for me. I get paranoid, hear things, get kinda strange. I'm definitely high maintenance in that regard

I wouldn't ever cheat on my husband or tell him i dont love him, but I guess that could just my experience. I have cried uncontrollably over the trash not being taken out, I've raged about the way he chews chips so I guess we all have our ways of presenting our mental illness.

So, probably some space is good right now. If he can come back committed to working on things then I'd give it a second chance.