If you don't like what you have chosen to study, don't think you are a good fit for it or that it is too hard for you, choose something else or go sideways or down a bit?

Most people have to be interested in what they're doing to do it or interested in the bigger picture (being a nurse?) enough to put up with learning the bits that don't interest.

I would work on getting drunk after big events rather than before, so you miss them. No showing up is worse than scars probably. They can't evaluate how well you'll do if you don't show up.

Maybe your mum cares, moans because you don't seem to be taking this course seriously. What did she study? Could she be any help? I'd find others in the program that you could hang out with occasionally, enough so you at least look forward to being around them so show up and/or get in the mood from their being in the mood.