I can relate to where you are coming from. Maybe your therapist is trying to empahsize that she is there for you no matter what. That you will be able to reach her even during the holidays when some feel so alone and sad. I truly belive she will not leave you until you are ready and even then slowly.

There is no good nor bad nor fast nor slow in therapy. Everyone goes at their own pace. I believe she is trying to tell you that there is no failing in therapy; it just is.

Could you maybe call your doc and ask them what the effects of increasing your meds may be? Tell them everything you are feeling or not as the case may be. Maybe it is not med related but something you need to discuss in therapy. I don't know but it is always good to give everyone as much information as possible.

Please don't sabatoge your own healing by not trusting the very person who is there for you. Tell her how you feel and see what she says. Please take care of yourself. I know you are the wise one and will make good choices.