My T and I talk about something fun first and then she says, "So, tell me how you're doing? Is there anything you need to talk about that happened since I last saw you?" or something along those lines. I usually say, "I'm good." She then repelies, "Now, tell me how you're really feeling" or "Remember who you're talking to" or "Think about where you are. Remember what I said about my door being a portal and when you enter through that door you can tell me anything and that includes how badly you're feeling." This means a lot to hear her say that, because like you I would feel like "If I keep saying I'm good then [she'll] think I'm getting better. If I say I'm terrible then [she'll] think [she's] not helping me." So, I totally understand how you feel about that.

But, therapy is about exploring ALL of your feelings. Sometimes they are good, sometimes they are horrible, sometimes they just ARE, but they are your feelings and they are VERY important. My therapist told me that therapy is about me and not to spare her feelings. She said she's a big girl and can take care of her own feelings and needs. She just wants me to be honest and tell her what I'm feeling and what I need. It's hard to do, because as much as she says that I can't help but consider her feelings and thoughts.