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Originally Posted by sugahorse
She consoled me that we were talking about termination, and that she'd be honest and open about when she felt I was OK to stop therapy.
She then mentioned the dreaded sentence - We know when we enter therapy that it is not forever, that we will have to say goodbye (I am TERRIBLE at saying goodbye and have never learnt to end things properly)
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Me too! The idea of ending therapy (again, for the umpteenth time with the umpteenth therapist) is always terrifying. But then again I always knew going into those therapists the rough time that the therapy would be ending. Not this time!
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Wow - so this makes me a bit nervous. Like....really nervous...?!? Am I took addicted to therapy? Or attached to my T?
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Define "addicted".
We're in therapy because we find it useful. We may really like being able to talk to someone and being able to figure things out, because maybe we don't have people who can fulfill that in our "real life". We do sometimes get a "high" feeling from therapy and really look forward to it, but I don't think you're probably addicted to it, just accustomed to it. And you're supposed to feel some sort of attachment to your T (depending on the orientation of the therapy, and many other factors so not everyone feels attached!) ... it's not a bad thing, it means that you've really gotten something from therapy. All in my opinion of course.
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How long will this tapering off process last?
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Depends. Some people get one session to taper off, some get a couple, some get absolutely no warning at all! Ideally it depends on what you and your T decide on, and how you're coping with stuff.
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Will I be OK, or will the wheels fall off?
I don't know... trying not to think about it. Also really wasn't sure what I should say to T - would I, oor would I not be ok to skip a week again?
Is there any point in being in therapy if I go bi-weekly?
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You will be okay! You've got a bunch of people here who care and are willing to listen. T isn't going to leave you high and dry without a safety net. So I'd bet that if you ever REALLY needed to go back to therapy with her, or anyone else -- you're more than free to do so. T's are supposed to be there to help.
See how you feel, then discuss it with T when you next talk/email/see her again. And yeah, there's a point to therapy if you go bi-weekly, or even less frequently than that! It's testing to see if you've managed to internalize some of the stuff you've figured out in therapy and can cope on your own with the skills you've learned. The bi-weekly is to check in to make sure you don't fall flat on your face, so to speak. And some people can't afford anymore than bi-weekly anyhow. (I've done bi-weekly or even less frequently for a while).
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Thoughts please - I'm just VERY confused right now. I don't even know what emotion I'm feeling.
I probably should be proud of myself that my T feels I'll be ok, but I'm not really.
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Maybe you feel scared? Confused? Abandoned? Sad? See if you can identify how you feel. Then sit with it.
http://www.psychpage.com/learning/li.../feelings.html
