I feel hurt, sad, ashamed, and I wonder what I did/said/didn't do/didn't say, if they've blocked me (and I won't even try emailing, just in case it's really true--because never ask a question you're afraid of the answer to.....), I hate myself for not being the first one to try to "fix" it if I 've been the one who neglected them first--because I know they'll never trust me again, so why bother. I withdraw from everything....sometimes for a LONG, long time...but then I wax philosophical (eventually), and I call them out of the blue, impulsively, set up an extravagant date, hate getting ready to go, put it off until the last minute, and am sulky and irritable when I get there. I decide I don't like them, anyway--because they're shallow and self-centered and don't care how much effort and pain it took for me to get there--they don't even act like they get it! They didn't read my mind! And they're not picking it up from how I'm acting. So f... them. And I go home and eat a lot of chocolate. And I'm flippant in any conversation with potential friends after that, because they're probably a--holes, too.
For real.