gee dreamer that's nearly exactly the way it feels to me... only my black hole is a gigantic swirling tornado of pitch and as I slip farther down inside, my hand must be easier to see as it reaches out the side...and usually the only one who sees it is my t. but is that enough when he is the only one? my world is contained within this black swirling mass.... why would I wish to be pulled back up to the top when I never escape, but only get close enough to see there is light above: none for me never for me... for others... I would rather not know this... leave me in the swirl.