you wrote 'When he hurts or scares me,' No one has the right to hurt or scare you, and saying sorry does not fix the fact he has over stepped the mark. you deserve better than this, you say yourself he uses you, get the hxxx out of there, this relationship is detremental to your wellbeing. there is someone out there in the world who is looking for their miss right who will treat you like a lady should be treated, with respect and dignity, you will find him eventually, but not if you stay in the relationship you are in now.