Hello lightening1, and welcome to PC. You are in good company here with many souls walking a similar path.

I'm sorry I do not have any help I can offer you in the moment, but please accept my support and know that I am listening. There will be someone here who may be able to offer you more so do check back...

Keep posting, and I look forward to getting to know you and to you being a part of the PC community.

kp