Oh thank you....it doesn't sound too weird at all! Maybe I do need to nurture myself a little more instead of punishing it all the time.

I just wish someone else could do it for once. I've never had that. Well, not since I was little anyhow.
My first GF was an emotional wreck and she was still with her BF (he was fine with it until he realised there would be no 'action' for him in the relationship) and only ever told me she loved me when she was drunk or high. Then came 11 years of nothing. My friends aren't affectionate types. Most of my life has been hug-less, kiss-less, not even a friendly pat on the back. I need hman contact so much. So much. Thus I torture the skin that no-one has loved.