Thanks Sannah but I have tried abusing him back (and i feel bad for it later) but then its either me abusing him back and releasing my anger (halfway only, the other half still remains and lingers and then calls back my old memories of other various abuses I went through), and at times I've stopped doing stuff for him for like 2-3 days... but then we're back again and I'm helping him out again.. I don't like seeing him cry, I'm also a believer of karma so I can't see a sick person be helpless but then I get furious when he's mean!

I've looked at him angrily, yelled back at him angrily, and pulled away support for 2-3 days, none of this has worked, and i always end up getting hurt. I also hate seeing him on bed like this, I feel for him. But then its either him on the bed or the old him who'd be more dominating and make you "fear" him...

I have run out of ideas on how to deal with this situation?

He also tells all his relatives that me and my mom are useless and hints them that we dont take care of him , which we are not! we do EVERYTHING for him. he's lucky to have this kind of support where everyone appears like a genie in his room to fix things for him.