Quote:
Originally Posted by Distressed2010
Thankyou so much for such a detailed response Elana. I'll try to find that book in India. If I'm not able to find it, could you give me some examples of how to write in the journal?
I ask this because for 5 years or so I used to write in the journal but at that time I was clueless why I was so sad all the time.. what I'm trying to say is that journaling hadn't helped me back then.. maybe I was writing it the wrong way? Am I supposed to ask myself certain questions when I'm writing?
And secondly, (i wanted to make a post of this but forgot!), I do pay attention to my actions and reactions and how they're tied to the past, BUT then I end up getting angry again because I think to myself, IF ONLY! i hadn't gone through so much, I wouldn't have to constantly struggle with confidence and fear, and all the other things that have come into me from the emotional and sexual abuse and growing up with overcontrolling/overauthoritative/silent treatment giving/etc etc parents.. not that I don't love them. i love them to death but I just get angry at why I had to suffer so much in my early life and why I still continue to struggle now because of the effects it has had on me.
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Hi D2010,
Thinking of you.
Hope you are feeling a bit better today.
I also have spent a lot of time writing in a journal, and noticing the pages start to look the same: "Why is life so difficult? Why am I so tired all of the time? Why do I always feel so stuck, unable to move?" I look at my past journals and I have written such statements over and over. This is where a bit of another's insight can be helpful. I have looked to a therapist to help me answer these questions... though I still don't believe I am coming to answers fast enough.
Although you are unable to find a therapeutic environment to help you answer questions, you can still work to answer them on your own. That is why I thought you might find insight in a book or two that you feel applies to your situation. For example, in
Trust After Trauma the author asks questions at the end of each chapter.
Questions such as... in the chapter on mind-sets:
In what areas of your life do you hold perfectionist standards? Were these standards a necessity during your trauma?
The author puts questions such as these throughout the book, at the end of each chapter and suggests that the reader write his or her own answers in a journal. It might be a helpful guide into new areas of thought you might not have otherwise considered?
E