Tough one. But your partner has to be ready to make some changes and take on more responsibility for her treatment if it's going to work for her. I know how much you care for her, but try to back off a little on the caretaking. Maybe that will spur her into doing a bit more on her own behalf.

Meantime, keep focusing on your own work with T. That's helping you get through this too. I hope things get better soon.