I feel so guilty. I am up at 5.30am because I'm feeling too guilty to let myself sleep. I keep thinking these thoughts over and over.....
I can't sleep because I should be doing other things.
I'm wasting my life away.
Time is running out.
I'm getting old.
Bla Bla bla
Stinking guilt!!! It's such a slave driver

I feel bad. I'm scared. Last night before I went to bed I was having lots of obsessions. More and more things in my house are becoming weapons that smeone could kill me with. I have to make sure I put belts away, certain power cords, pillows, knives, and coat hangers. I'm wondering how many more things will become weapons. It's only getting worse. It only used to be knives. I'm scared of fire and having obsessions about being stabbed.