My sister is back in the hospital again. It is just constant back and forth to the hospital anymore for her. She is extremely thin and frail. I'm starting to come to terms with the fact that she probably isn't going to make it. My t and I were talking about it today and I started crying. Started, but stopped myself pretty quickly. T told me that I don't have to be strong about this. Go ahead and cry. But it felt like I'd absolutely dissolve into nothingness if I let myself let go.

Grief is a hard thing. Watching my sister fade away like this puts everything else into perspective. Everything else seems pretty trivial when you are watching your sister slowly die.

T was wonderful and just sat with me. We talked about my sister, his father, last moments with loved ones. I felt very close to him today (even though I pretty much always do feel close to him). He didn't try to fix things. We just sat. Special man.