Realizing a trigger ahead of time is one of the first things... but also deciding upon the response you would rather make, and rehearsing it... with a trigger you often don't know you've reacted till after you have. By rehearsing the thought of the trigger and the response, you program your unconscious to respond how you want, and it will, in time, become more automatic. It does take time and effort. Start small. If you can pick something, like a person's always picking on you for how your hair looks... something you know will happen... it will be easier to see how well it works. (Think ahead of time... they always say something.. I will see how long it takes them to say something this time... I know they do this, it isn't about me or my hair... it is about them.. I want to say... thus and thus. etc) It might not work the first, or even the third time, but it will help in the long run... : )