wow everyone...thank you! i feel like i have a lot to think about. i really do appreciate all the different perspectives to consider.

i kind of feel like i'm so impressionable that whatever my T says really gets to me, and i do need to sit with it and think about it instead of just taking it in. it feels like my t really wants my partner to have a DID specialist (like she is) but i have also felt like having 8 years with the same therapist IS important. and i certainly dont think it would help anyone to have us seeing the same T. it has felt weird to consider asking my partner how her therapy is going, but i sorta asked her the other day about how she felt about going to every other week, and my partner agreed that it's not very helpful and she will want to go back to every week. i'm glad she feels that way.

i agree that her therapy and her healing is for her to deal with. i do want to give her the space to do her own work. it's just hard to know where our individual therapy ends and where our relationship work together begins.

amandalouise - thank you for sharing your thoughts. it really helped me to gain some perspective on my thoughts... and you said some things i think i haven't been able to put in words myself. it's weird to think that anyone else in the world could know anything about what my life is like with a DID partner... but i'm not alone. again, thank you for sharing your perspective.

and i hear a lot of you mentioning couples therapy or trying out a session together. i will have to think about that. it seems scary on one hand, but also i could see that maybe being helpful as well.

Elana05 thank you also. i really got a lot form your words. it is helpful to know that you can relate.

oh... so much to think about. thank you to everyone who has replied. your support is very much appreciated.

but off i go, because i have the day off from work and i'm going to try to use it well! i'm getting a shiatsu massage today! and i'm going to bring my partner so she can see what it's all about in case she might want to try it. i find it so helpful and my massage therapist is a great, healing person.