Why do I feel so numb? i do not feel happy or sad, nor like crying or like laughing at the cxxp i have to deal with, i feel nothing emotionally, not depressed,not anxious, not pxxd off just numb! like hey what will be will be, why bother trying to fight the inevitible or the system.

I didn't even bother getting out of bed today, i looked out the window, it was raining, i thought do i really want to go (by mobility scooter) 4 miles getting wet to sit in an office and do what i could easily do in bed on my laptop, i quickly answered no, made a few phonecalls and here I am 5 pm and still in my comfy warm dry bed, no music on, no noise at all, just me and my laptop, hey i haven't even said goodmorning to my gerbils yet!

it's like I am giving up

but hey i never give up a fight of injustice so what is going on, why am i feeling so empty, so numb, so 'i don't care' ish??