I'm sorry to hear about your brother.

Please don't take anything I say the wrong way. The first thing that popped out at me is your linguistics. You say things like "at his feet" and "his replacement". You don't want the type of women that would be "at your feet". You also dont want to be anyone's "replacement". You want to be an alpha male, but you don't need to be a jerk to be one.

SOME women mistake jerky behavior as confidence. SOME women mistake cockiness for confidence. This is definitely not all women and you wouldn't want to be with women that tolerate jerky behavior. Women are attracted to confidence...the same way that men are attracted to confident women.

The funny thing is that as soon as you stop treating this as a goal that needs to be obtained it will happen naturally. Just go out and have fun with women with no intentions and no expectations. If you have trouble meeting women you should try to get a hobby that involves other people.

Try online dating...just to get back into the pool. Plentyoffish is free and has a huge userbase. Again, don't have any expectations. In fact, you should expect that only 1 out of 20 will even respond to your messages. That's just the way online dating works...it has nothing to do with you so don't feel rejected. Even if you make new female friends it will help to build your confidence.

My last suggestion is purely optional. Get a motorcycle...a newer one. It is a huge conversation starter and you will get a lot of women that want to go for rides. If riding is not for you then consider something else that will get you out of the house and having fun around other people.