I don't even know where to start, however I will say I am glad I found this site. Nice to know I am not the only one suffering the way I do, which my brain has told me this but somehow when you get in it, its really hard to imagine that anyone else is this bad off.

Not really sure why I am writing all of this. I've just been really down today. I stopped seeing my phychiatrist about 3 yrs ago. Stopped my meds thought maybe by moving and starting anew somewhere else maybe I could conquer it, ha seems it hasn't exactly worked. Not even sure what they had diagnosed me with back then. Was supposed to start taking mood stablilizers but I didn't. My life is just so fu**ed up!

Think I just really need to talk to someone, someone who doesn't know me. Made an appt with new doc in this new town I call home now, but the first availabe appt they had isn't til the first week of March, so now I'm like great, just great whenever I need help the most it's always unavailable!

I saw this woman on Nancy Grace Swift Justice yesterday and everything she told Nancy was exactly how I feel the majority of time, which is I am ready to go(meaning to die), tired of fighting the fight. Anyone got any words of encouragement?

Sorry, wish I could help to encourage others but real hard when you can't even encourage yourself. Maybe tomorrow will be better!