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Feb 10, 2011, 04:40 PM
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Sannah responses in orange
Squiggles responses in purple
Originally Posted by Squiggle328 
I just want to get to a place where I am comfortable saying, "I am in therapy and that's okay."
Shame maybe? Not sure it is shame. I just feel like something is WRONG with me that I am in therapy. Why am I so different? What can't I deal with life?
I want to STOP worrying about what my therapist thinks about me, or if I am doing stupid things in therapy, or if I am making a fool of myself, or if I am doing this just for attention.
You want to be perfect? I don't view myself as a perfectionist. I don't like to be embarrassed or humiliated. If I am doing something I think is the right way, and then find out that I have been doing it all wrong, that makes me feel like a fool.
I have always been 'different'. One who thinks outside the box. Never been able to be a 'cookie cutter' type of person. My therapist tells me that this is what makes me so unique, and I should embrace that about myself. She sees it as a good thing and wants me to explore why I seem to view it negatively.
She questions why I allow others to take away my power and why I don't stand up for myself and my beliefs. Why do I allow other's opinions overpower mine?
Why can't I go to my appointments, come home and not think about anything until the next appointment?
Maybe because you are a doer and you want things fixed ASAP? That may very well be the case. I am impatient. This causes anxiety, which causes fear. I don't like feeling like that, so I scramble to find the answers myself. I want it fixed now, so that I can move on. I do not like to be stuck in neutral. I guess I don't like to sit with an emotion or feeling? [/quote]
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