Oh no, it's fine I wanted to hear everyone's thoughts on the subject so it's good to see it from your point of view too.
Of course I don't enjoy having BP so that's definetly not why I would choose to stay the same, but because my life with BP has become such a big part of me that I don't have any recollection of what "normal" is like. So, for me, the fear of a life unknown is much greater than the fear of a continually miserable existance.