What a beautiful post, ss
So wise and insightful.
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Originally Posted by sanityseeker
My hope is that meditation will centre us, help us to observe our fears differently or at least from a different place, when confronted by them.
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This is my hope too. I also like to think of meditation as "mind training". I find it immensely encouraging that meditation has been shown to change the brain structure of people who take up this practice regularly. Over the decades I have etched some really deep "anxiety pathways" into my brain. My anxiety response is almost always on. Meditation provides an opportunity to etch some healthier pathways into my brain by giving me a tool with which to cultivate a sense of peace and calm within my own body and mind. This may well turn out to be a life-long mission for me! But I like to think that each time I meditate I am taking a step in the direction of inner peace.
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Originally Posted by sanityseeker
I attended a family gathering yesterday. A funeral for my dad's brother. On top of the anticipated anxiety of being in a crowd etc were all these emotions about my mother. Several times I needed to fight the tears and the pressure to meltdown under its weight. It will be 30 years this April. People say it gets easier with time.... not true. On some levels it just gets harder with time because as each day, year, decade passes you miss them more. At least that is how it is for me.
I relied on moments of meditation to help return me to centre throughout the day to manage the anxiety and keep me in place. I did make an early exit but it was progress for me to actually attend. It was a challenge afterwards on the trip home to not obsess on replaying the day just to pick apart my performance or allow something that hurt my feelings to keep ringing in my head.
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Well done!! Really, really well done. I'm so glad that meditation helped you to get through this experience. I'm so sorry that you had to deal with some very painful feelings about your mother's passing
I do agree with you that the death of a parent can give rise to a grief so profound that it really doesn't lessen with time.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sanityseeker
It took a rather lengthy self affirming meditation last night to pull me out of the sadnesses of the past, beyond the worries of today and the future, apart from my disappointments, shame and overall sense of hopelessness. I grasped like a lifeline the calm that came with every affirmed breath to renew again my acceptance of what is, letting go of all else in those moments of peaceful solitude. Refreshed and reaffirmed to keep on keepin' on.
It has been a quiet restful day. Spent some time watching and waiting for the baby hummers to take flight. It can be kind of hypnotizing. I find it very relaxing. The warm weather has meant more time outside. Early spring bulbs are beginning to show up and buds are appearing on shrubs and trees. It was a delight to see.
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This is so beautiful expressed! I'm really happy you have found this wonderful calm and peace