my ex husband is going to visit my mother in florida. we have been apart for over three years. our divorce was pretty amicable, but about two years ago he called my mother and said some really hurtful things, and we had it out. i was starting the process to adopt a child, and he told my mom that she shouldn't recommend me because i am "unfit" to be a parent. we didn't talk for about a year after that.

i talked to him last year when our dog died, and things were a little bit better, but we don't communicate and he won't be my friend on facebook. he is friends with almost all of my family members, and i don't mind him keeping in touch, but this is just too much.

i also heard that he is planning a trip to my town in the summer, and that my sister offered to let him stay with her. i am pissed. he has no sense of boundaries. if he can't even be friends with me, then he can't have the benefit of being part of my family. am i overreacting? if he's going to travel 3000 miles to visit my family, shouldn't he at least let me know? i don't want to be angry about this, but i am.

thanks for letting me vent.