Basically I think that claiming that ettiquette is fake and irrelevant is an excuse for the "might makes right" advocates to push their way to the top. I rarely see someone who isn't a bully or a socially/physically pushy person make this kind of claim. Unfortunately, they are the ones I find that I have to flex my muscle at as well to get done what I need to. If I can without raising my voice, so much the better.
There is something to be said for the iron hand in the velvet glove.