Quote:
Originally Posted by openhand
Since T's have been taught to deal with people like us, should we try to be nice to our T's or is it ok to lash out at them if they do or say something that bothers us? I know it doesn't feel right to be mean to someone but then again I know that T's have been taught to forget about us as soon as we leave their offices so why should we care?
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I think the best thing to do is be honest with your feelings.
Your T
knows that you are not attacking them personally. If you have pent up anger then show it. Get it off your chest.
That is what T is for. But I think it is more honest to say, "I
feel really angry when I hear your response about..." or "That
makes me feel pissed off and hurt because..." It seems more productive then a statement like, "I hate
you or
you always do this," because it puts the emphasis on how the session makes
you feel.
Your T knows your anger is due to the past.
It can feel very much like anger is boundless and infinitely deep. But don't worry. It is not. Best to address it.
However, I want to add that I don't think our T's forget about us when we leave their offices. Instead, they have had professional training in the therapeutic relationship. It is just different than a friend relationship. I think it's like - we are not Ts friend. We are their work - a person with a story that they care about and are invested in.