Quote:
Originally Posted by yagalada
I'm trying to figure my anger problems out. I had an outburst last night that started with my husband accidentally breaking my keyboard. The anger had nothing to do with the keyboard, or my husband although unfortunately he was the target of my rage. I don't know why at that particular moment all my rage came out but it was weird and scary and awful.
I told him I hated him and I don't. I said some really messed up stuff that I didn't mean and can't take back. I'm not mad at him, I am mad at my life, my past, other people, myself.
And now, I feel awful, and the shame spiral started and I can't fix any of this.
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Well your definitly on your next step just with the realization that it's not about the keyboard; there was definitly a trigger...and sometimes it takes the triggers forever to amount to a blow up. I donno if you do this too, but my recreation has always been to get angry, go overboard, and then feel paralyzing guilt...I keep doing that this week especially...anaylsis is kickin up and causin me to spin lol. I think you can fix it; the anger is beyond your husband...maybe a father is where the anger really belongs..I donno.
Thanks for this though!
-obj