I have this part... Nina. she is very self-assured and confident and mature. much more of a responsible person than I am. she is convinced that all this 'stuff' about my past is nonsense. my childhood was pretty normal and I have a good family and I'm a pretty awful person for talking about them the way I do.

she is much stronger than me and seems to have an easier time getting off her butt and squaring her shoulders against the world. I rely on her a lot.

she has been present a lot lately. and when she is there during T, it can be rather hard. I feel like I don't belong there. obviously I'm just fine and should really get my butt back home and take care of all the responsibilities that I have neglected while I've been busy moping around. she makes going to T feel very silly. I don't like feeling like that because it makes me feel like I'm wasting time and money.

anyway. I'm not sure how to deal with her. obviously, I feel like she serves a big purpose in my life right now. she kind of keeps me functioning. but is she stuck in denial? or am I really just freaking out over nothing and should just let it go and move on? I don't know...