@ sunflowers07 Only you had your reasons why u did what u did, and Im no one to judge u. When I first got sick, I was in isolation most of the time. I was shook and I didnt wanna leave the house. Since my support from most loved ones were real limited, and I wasnt gettin the help that I needed from so called therapists. So, With my eperiences with livin life in proverty and pain and mental conditioning from my martial arts training, I began the very difficult process of geting my life together. Ive been battling paranoid schizophrenia 4 over seven years with little to no support from the majority of my family members. Its an uphill battle, and a hell of a rollercoaster ride. Now I look back, and conteplate on my accomplishments and a more openminded perspective on life. But mastering yourself takes a lifetime. Mastering yourself with a disability is much more difficult. I hope your journey to find yourself and getting ur life back is successful and positive! U can do it!! Thanx for ur support and understandin