sara you make a good point. borderlines attack themselves utterly and completely. we cannot see anything positive in ourselves. even not knowing instantly what to choose in line at McDonalds can become something to attack yourself about. we are not the only ones to take ages to make decisions - i nkow plenty of people who cannot make decisions and who are not borderline. what sets us aside is the bashing we give ourselves for not knowing. probably because we didn't know fast enough, or didn't choose the healthiest option, or because because because - we can invent reason to self hate like no other - that's where the problem is - in how we react - not that we cannot choose

i think we need to seperate deeper problems with self identity and so on, from choice making regarding food

self identity problems can ruin your life, but choosing pepsi over cola and feeling antse later is not the same thing at all. mind you, having said that - i have done something so trivial, such as choose something i later deemed 'wrong', and gone home and self harmed because i've used it as evidence that i can't even think about simple things. little things can attach themselves to big stuff and become part of the bigger problem, acting as evidence that you can't do ANYTHING - black and white thinking.

oh, my head hurts.