jazzy, I'm sorry everything's so confusing for you now. Do you do any yoga or meditation, even just slow breathing when things whirl around you and you feel overwhelmed? You sound like me, and I know the meditation/visualization/breathing my T is teaching me helps a lot!

I'm confused about your T/Ts. Are you talking about 1 or 2? I thought you have 1 old T, the one you talked about whom you still want to see even though you are at school now. Is there another one from the past you are referring to in this post?