View Single Post
 
Old Feb 18, 2011, 06:35 PM
Distressed2010's Avatar
Distressed2010 Distressed2010 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2010
Posts: 295
Quote:
Originally Posted by sabby View Post
I think the time to figure these kinds of things out is when your gut first twinges and you think.....rut roh....something is amiss here. Take some time to think about why your gut did that. Try to look at the big picture (which is hard to do at times) and see exactly what happened to make you feel uncomfortable.

Everyone is different and handles things like this differently. In learning how to deal affectively, one may have to have more proof than another before deciding that something isn't right. So don't put yourself down for it just because you may not have gotten it right away. The fact that you posted here and questioned about it is awesome. That shows that you are thinking about things and questioning the right things!

There are a number of ways that you can respond to both men and women alike who may be prying too far with personal questions. I like to deal with thing with humor as much as possible, but it does get the point across. I'll say things like "If I told you, I'd have to kill you" or "That information is on a need to know basis only, and you don't need to know". Of course, I'm smiling at the person while I'm saying those things so they know that I'm not angry with them, but they know I will not go there. If you don't want to use humor, it's perfectly alright to tell someone that you don't feel comfortable discussing the subject with them, or that you feel it's too personal a question and can we change the subject?

Most people will back off and give you your space and have respect for you. Some will not. Of those that will not, then they truly are not the ones you want to associate with because they don't respect boundaries or privacy.

Thank you sabby, that really helps, and yes I do like the humor examples a lot. I think I'm gonna use your "if i tell you i have to kill you then". LOL.



I also don't like it when a girl acquaintance address me as "Hey *****!" or "hey sexy *****"... what can i say to her without being rude about it?

Also, if a guy calls me "sexy" or "baby" and i want it to stop, how should i respond?


one time there was this guy, who was practicing a monologue in one of my acting classes a while back and he said to me "yeah you *****.." it was part of his monologue but I thought he was saying it to me, and I said stop i dont like it. and he kept doing it. i said stop it! i don't like that. and he still kept going. so i said "okay fine, keep going but i'm not listening." and i walked away.

He looked insulted. 3 days later he saw me again and said "hey you crazy ***** you crazy ***** crazy crazy ***** whats up?" I sat there, angry for a second, and got up and walked away. it was me, him and my scene partner. I told my scene partner i'm leaving. the guy also held my shoulders and shook em while saying that. I DID NOT LIKE THAT A BIT. but i didn't know if it would have been worth it to say anything back to him or walk away??

The anger in me was there for days!