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Feb 18, 2011, 10:29 PM
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Member Since: Jan 2011
Posts: 95
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happycheeks ...
First off, don't come down too negatively upon yourself because you currently do not have a boyfriend like other young women you attend college with. To do so is only adds to lowering your self-esteem. You don't need to have that added burden of beating yourself up added upon your shoulders at the moment. OK?
What counts, is that you need to learn to love and accept yourself as you are (and for what you hope / aspire to be). You have to remain true to yourself. In doing so, your self confidence will increase over time and you'll radiate that confidence to others around you. People tend to behave like the proverbial moth. They gather towards light rather than darkness.
Think of how you may feel by being around someone who is always either down in the dumps or complaining about this or that or whatever. Most likely, out of kindness or pity for the person, you'll be able to tolerate it for awhile, but then it becomes a bit of a drag upon you. You move on from the person. Hence they in essence "pushed you away" by their lack of self esteem / self confidence / negative nature.
People who are optimistic (rather than pessimistic) in their daily lives tend to radiate confidence and surety about how they relate to the world and it relates to them. As I mentioned above, people gravitate towards them as a result. Granted, they may not all look like they fell out of the latest issue of Cosmopolitan or GQ magazines (which does help if you are blessed with "good looks"), but then again, most of us don't. In time, looks fade. What remains within is what ultimately counts.
Don't belittle yourself or push yourself into potential situations whereby you'll wind up compromising your beliefs or moral standards. To do so will only cause you grief in the long run.
Work on caring for yourself, and in due time others will come to you or you to them. We usually find others who acquire a meaning or fondness to us by becoming active in an area which we find interest in or derive enjoyment from. Like interests tend to share like similarities. You won't find that in a bar. You won't find that in a nightclub. Most likely, you'll find it in what YOU enjoy doing ... hopefully with a possibility of engaging others in the process.
Stay true to yourself. Dont' give up. Improve YOU before you can improve others. Don't rush things or compare yourself to others.
Take care,
vertebrae 
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