Abby,
Good for you! You took the first step! I know it was really hard for you, but I am proud of you for doing it. I really hope you can keep making baby steps and eventually you will be able to see a counselor. They will be much more able to help you. It is really a vulnerable feeling to "let people in" and share your feelings, but it really does help. Even if you have to do it the same way, like I mentioned before, by handing a therapist your journal or writing down your feelings - I really hope you will give it a try. Until then, keep posting and getting support here - you are NOT alone!