My "friend" gave my other friend some presents to give to me. I don't undestand why he seems to be avoiding me though.....for over 2 months now. He's the one who had to open his big mouth about having a crush on me. But, the thing is, he is soooooooooooooo fickle. He first met my best friend about 4 years ago, and they had like a year of a "FWB" fling. She became close with his family, and everyone thought that he really loved her, but was just scared to admit it or something. Well, finally after like 2 years of hearing about this guy, I finally got to meet him. At first, I thought they were both really obnoxious with their showing off how close they are. But life's too short so I got over it, and we all became really good friends. Now, it seems like they've cut me out again. I'm really hurt. Especially because of this guy's game playing. I had developed a little crush on him too, but would NEVER EVER have told him. I knew what my crush was all about.......I was lonely. But, as I said he had to open his big mouth, and blab all his dumb feelings to me, which in turn I stupidly did the same over email (you do really stupid things when running on no sleep) However I also explained to him that he might have these feelings for me because he is also lonely. Well, he talked it over with our other friend, and I guess he wasn't genuine with his feelings. But, I was. So, it really hurt me to have my true heart dragged out for everyone to see, and then get it stomped on. It was like, "Oh, just kidding, just testing you, I wanted to see how you felt because I needed an ego boost or something." And, my best friend seems to be harboring these feelings of jealousy, or she maybe feels that I betrayed her. I was so confused within our little triangle. She kept telling me that she didn't want to "go there" again with him. So, in my head, I thought, well, maybe someday, when she's with someone really special, and if him and I are both alone, blah, blah, blah........Now, my mind is clear enough to know not to play with thoughts like those. I guess, this is all still bothering me because I was never "allowed" to talk it over with them. They had talked about it alone, and didn't really want to bring up the subject again. That's what they said when I tried to talk about it. I'm not important enough for them to listen to how it affected me. I hated how I just let it go, so they wouldn't have to be uncomfortable. I really should have spoken up because it obviously still bothers me. I'm just not sure if I should let him go as a friend. I do miss the 3 of us hanging out. I don't understand why I'm excluded. That hurts the most......that I can be dropped so easily as a friend. My best friend doesn't even understand why I'm hurt. She somehow thinks that it shouldn't bother me. I sense this feeling of her wanting to keep me away from him. She seems to be desparately holding onto something with him that really isn't there. ANd I let myself get involved too. Sorry, if this is so long, and if I sound like a whiny baby. I just have to get it out there. I'll stop now, it's like picking at a healing wound.