My Support Forums - View Single Post - Please help!! majorly depressed after confronting abuser!!

Distressed2010 · Feb 20, 2011, 04:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leed

Oh I'm SO HAPPY you confronted this animal --- do you know WHY he called you those names?? Because you took his POWER away!!! That's why he's angry!! You reclaimed YOUR power and took his away!!! That is so wonderful!!

You are such a STRONG person to be able to do this! I applaud you for doing this, because now he feels like he's been peeled wide open -- he feels like you took a big portion of his manhood away because these animals thrive on secrecy!!! You took that away from him!! TEEHEE!! Way to go !!! Even tho you didn't tell anyone else, by you confronting HIM - there are no "secrets" between you anymore.

You are NOT a loser!!! You just WON!!! You are NOT a failure in life -- for Pete's sake, you have your Masters!! Now you can go ahead and do whatever it is you want to do. There are NO MORE secrets. You told! You let that creep know that you weren't going to let him take your power away anymore and he was all thru.

The ball is in YOUR court now!!!

Please don't be depressed - that's easy for me to say, but dearheart you have a wonderful life ahead of you. I cannot imagine what you've gone thru -- but you've made it clear to him that he can't hurt you anymore!! Don't let him live RENT FREE in your head!!! Close that off to him -- it's all done. You won. Visualize a wall in your mind and put that up to block him in your mind so you can't hear him anymore. I do that for "unsavory voices." I have this "clear plexiglass wall" that I visualize in my mind - these bad people are behind that wall and when they start talking I push an invisible button and the wall goes up -- that way I cannot hear them anymore. My shrink says it's a great idea -- and it works!! Sounds nuts, but if it works for me -- oh well. LOL

As far as your peers go -- why compare yourself to them?? You aren't "like" them. You are YOU. We're all different, and do things at different times and rates. You're still young ~ you can't expect to be financially secure yet - heavens I'm 61 and I'm STILL not financially secure! LOL Don't let THAT depress you -- i never went to college.

And I've been in and out of therapy all my life -- I think finally i've graduated.

You have done great in my mind. And again - I applaud you!! I think you're great. And I think you'll DO great in life because you're strong! Big hugs, Lee

Thank You leed, I really needed to hear this

I also had told my entire family after i confronted him, and their responses wierded me out as well (wrote about that in my other posts).

i guess I compare myself to my peers because I really really wish I had a different life, a different childhood, then I'd have a different outcome. I'd be naturally positive and a hard worker. Now, even if i want to work hard on something I like, the thoughts of past come back... can't focus.

I had also expected a very different outcome for me at this age. When I was 20, I was very depressed but didn't know it, but i was very optimistic about the future and thought by the time I'm in my late 20s,I'll have a splendid career, a husband, career, friends, and a home. Yeah. BIG disappointment. Instead I found out, I have none of that but definitelyI've got TONS of problems, all thanks to my childhood. For the longest time I didn't even know I had had a bad childhood. I thought what I had was just normal! Feel like I just skipped 15 years of life for real.