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i can understand why u're flooded with emotions. way too much happening at the same time. it's like being abandoned in your case with significant ppl that were in your life. i hope things settle down for you soon. just know we care and are here for you.
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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