Abby

Just from what you've written here, you are definitely NOT being silly. There is definitely something going on that might very likely be helped by the right doctor. Even if you feel fine sometimes, the fact that sometimes you DON'T feel good is what is important and should be treated. The fact that you've hurt yourself, even if you think you were only experimenting, is a concrete physical sign that something is going on.

I think that is so excellent that your sister has been receptive and wants to help. I would really take advantage of that and let her go with you to find someone who can help. Definitely write some stuff down if you are afraid you won't be able to talk when you are there.

One thing I am not sure about, your earlier (bad) experience, what that with a therapist or a regular physician? Often a good physician will recognize the problem and point you to the specialty help you need but sometimes they just aren't of the right mind to "get it". I hope you can find a good specialist this time, a therapist, psychologist, and I hope your experience will be 1000 times better. Don't give up and even if the new person seems OK make sure that you can be comfortable enough to talk with them. That may take some time and a good therapist will work with you to build that trust. If they don't then just look for someone else. I hope with the support of your sister it will be easier.

Good luck and KEEP POSTING HERE! We all want things to work out well for you and we want to know how you are doing.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
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