I don't want to make this post too long by describing everything that's wrong with our relationship but at this point in my life i know i need to move on and find somebody better before it's too late.
I'm having trouble doing this even though I'm not really in love with the man I'm currently with. I find myself constantly worrying about what he's going to do when he figures out that I'm planning to leave him.I'm not necessarily afraid of being beaten to death because I know i can outrun him but I worry that whatever he might do when we finally break up will be traumatic to out children who are 5 and 8. I've been considering leaving where we live now and going back to my home town with my family and just sneaking away without telling him anything in advance. the problem with that is there are few jobs in my home town and I would really like to pursue a relationship with a man that lives here.The guy I want to be with is 10 years younger than me, handsome, in good shape ,comes from a well off family, has a great job and is very independent. He also really listens to me when I talk and appreciates me for my unique qualities.He's close to his family and well regarded by his friends. It' seems stupid to leave a guy like that behind just to get away from a loser.I haven't really told him how I feel because i know 100% if my current boyfriend suspects me of cheating he will try and kill the other guy. He thinks it will be ok because he's confident that he will be able to get off on an insanity defence. I don't actually expect anyone to have any advice for me i just needed to tell someone.