Thanks so much for the replies!

I am at the bookstore with Noah and waiting on two friends. Noah's reading Harry Potter and the goblet of fire.

I feel a bit better. I'm ok with the people. I seem to get better and worse again.

My ex-BF is on my nerves. My new BF is not but I am being cautious because I so want this to work- be the best at whatever it is. He seems to understand my brain issues- he has a phd in behavioral pharmacology after all. So I can babble to him about hallucinations and feeling embarrassed and he just tells me it's ok. That's so great.