This may seem a little trite, but what are you doing to care of yourself? Please take some "me" time to sooth your inner soul. Go for a walk, play basketball, work in the yard, anything. You care about your family right now and seem to be under some unforeseen stress. Life can change and for the better. It just takes small steps. I hate when therapists ask this question, but am going to ask anyway because it is a place to start or at last dream. If you had a magic wand, what would a perfect life be like for you? Dreaming is the first step in becoming. Hang in there and keep talking.