hi darla, so glad you started this thread. it takes support for most ppl to get sober and stay sober. have you given AA a go? it helped me so much and i still go tho not as many mtgs. a week now but i don't ever want to forget where i came from...using alcohol. it's been 21 years for me sober but i did it a minute at a time at first, got busy so i would be distracted, and reached out for help from others who had stayed sober but understood the power of alcohol and it's lure. alcohol will promise you more than you even want or dream of but using it will take everything from you, even your soul. it's lieing to you.
keep posting and hope we can continue to give you hope that you can stop. i do hope that you'll try AA too. it saved my life. i do believe it can help you too.