Check with a mental health care person, they can screen you. That really is the best way to go with such concerns, get professionally diagnosed, find out what treatment is available.

Can be a relief to find out at last whatever it is. Even if it is something challenging. Knowing what is going on is a vital first step.

Any of us could try an armchair diagnosis but it wouldn't be fair and couldn't be completely accurate. You deserve good competent care and answers to your questions.

Best wishes!